Parsing the NFL MVP Debate

Last night, I was running at the gym (way too cold outside for that stuff) and SportsNation was on the telly in front of me. They were debating the NFL MVP and their top five candidates were: Tom Brady, Michael Vick, Phillip Rivers, Matt Ryan, and Aaron Rodgers. Then I took a quick look at Peter King this morning and his MVP watch list is: Tom Brady, Aaron Rodgers, Matt Ryan, Drew Brees, and Maurice Jones-Drew.

As much as I really, really like Aaron Rodgers, if the playoffs started now, his team would be out of it, so I have to ding him. Same goes for Phillip Rivers and I don't care about his mad numbers. The best player on a fair to middling team hardly qualifies as league MVP by my reckoning.

As to the rest, I love that King included MJD on his list because if the Jax Jags hang on to win the AFC South, it will largely be because little big man carried them there.

Michael Vick likewise. No way the Eagles are sitting atop the NFC East at 9-4 with Donovan McNabb or Kevin Kolb in there.

And a strong case can be made for Matt Ryan, too. The guy is so reliable in big moments and he is remarkably consistent.

Right now, Brady's hair has morphed from 'Justin Bieber' to 'roadie for a Grateful Dead Tribute Band' (they're never billed as 'cover bands' are they? They always call themselves 'tribute' bands. Anyway.) Regardless of how his Ubermodel wife is instructing him to keep his coiffure, Brady is playing quarterback better than I've ever seen the position played. Whereas Peyton Manning because always looks for the big score, big throw, dagger pass, Brady just takes what the defense gives them and will kill teams by any means possible, frequently through attrition. He's happy to have yards after the catch stats. He gets the ball out so quick, in such perfect spots for his receivers that he throws them open and, even if he's throwing to a guy who is just four yards past the line of scrimmage, he puts them in terrific positions to make plays. I thought the Patriots would be good again this year, but I didn't think they'd be this good but they are the best team in the NFL largely due to Tom Brady.

But let me make a case for Troy Polamalu. (You had to see that coming, yes?)

First of all, so quarterback-centric is the league that quarterbacks are almost teeing off from the ladies tee as it were, putting guys like Troy or Terrell Suggs or Justin Tuck or Clay Matthews at a serious disadvantage. For a defensive player to have the kind of impact that Troy is having speaks volumes about his ability to impose his will on a game while playing a position that isn't built for to do so.

He is the best defensive player in the game and I believe he might be the best overall player in the league. At the very least, he should be in that conversation. It's not just that he makes tackles, it's when he makes tackles. It's not just the forced fumbles, it's when he forces them. The interception always seem to come at moments where the game could turn against the Steelers for good.

Since he was out for most of last year, it's easy to point to what the Steelers are with him and what they are without him.

Without Troy, the Steelers finished 9-7, just out of the playoffs and nobody who witnessed it will ever forget that five game stretch of stench they left on the field. The Steelers defense had just a dozen interceptions last year (terrible) and allowed a little over 20 points per game (right in the middle of the pack). Sure, the special teams suck didn't help them any, but the defense didn't come up big in any situations when they needed it either. With him, after only 13 games, they have 17 interceptions (six of those are Troy's), they allow just over 15 points per game. The defense is not just keeping them in games, its actually winning games. And they continue to do that without the best run stopping lineman in the league because of Troy's ability to come up big when the moment demands it.

The numbers are startling, but if I look hard at the Steelers wins and losses, I can point to at least three games they would have lost without him, probably four. I realize it's hard to project what would have happened in the abstract. Football is complicated, tons of plays are run and 22 guys are on the field for each one, so I cannot say with complete and total certainty that the Steelers would have lost these games. Still ... I'm pretty sure they would have lost.

-- the season opener to Atlanta. I know Matt Ryan is still shaking his head wondering where the hell Troy came from to in the 4th quarter of that game. Simply put, he just appeared at the sideline, like a freaking apparition. The interception gave the ball back to the Steelers offense in field goal range. That game wouldn't have even gone to OT had Jeff Reed done his job (don't get me started), but I think there's a very good chance they lose that one without Troy.

-- at Buffalo. Troy's ridiculous at the goal-line interception saved the Steelers asses. Again.

-- at Baltimore. With an anemic Steelers offense, on the road, and in need of a big play, it was Troy, because it's always Troy, causing the fumble that may have won game and might have won the division.
-- versus Cincinnati. With the whole team suffering a Ravens hangover, and with the offense playing even worse than they had the week before in Baltimore, the team needed something. Anything. A loss to the Bungles would have undone almost all of the good work from this season. Bengals 7, Troy 23.

Without Troy, they could easily be 8-5 and battling for a spot; they could be 7-6 on the outside looking in; and they could be worse 6-7, much like they were last year. Instead, the Steelers are 10-3, atop the AFC North and in position to secure the #2 seed in the playoffs.

Largely due to just one man. Just what about that doesn't say MVP?

The Balls & Whistles MVP tracker:
Troy, Brady/Bieber/Burnout, MJD, Vick, Matty Ice.

Suisham Kicks Steelers to OT Win Over Bills

Anybody out there still questioning the Steelers decision to fire Jeff Reed?

Yeah. Didn't think so.

The Sad Buffalo Bills Fan Face, Revisited

The Buffalo Bills have built a tradition of stinkitude in the last decade or so, building on the already established tradition of torturing their fanbase, as one after another in a series of obtuse, abstruse decisions are made, regarding players, regarding coaches, regarding the depth chart. It seems that everybody in that organization, from the owner on down, is living in a world of delusion.

Their continued insistence on recycling old, mediocre coaches in search of the "next Marv Levy" leaps to mind one of their more obvious foibles.

Terrell Owens Makes Sad Buffalo Face

From True/Slant on September 15, 2009:

Patriots Win Makes Terrell Owens & Nation Sad
My in-laws have a home in Cape Cod and I spend at least one week a year with them, which happens to be this week. It’s wonderful here, but I found myself behind enemy lines, as it were, watching the New England Patriots take on the Buffalo Bills at a little restaurant in Truro, Massachusetts. It was one of the more subdued experiences of my sports viewing life.

Despite my fondness for the region, the fact that this game meant nothing to me, that the Bills mean nothing to me, I wanted the Pats to lose. I wanted this very much. And I wanted their fans to suffer.

In the interest of full disclosure, I really like New England, the actual place, not the NFL franchise. I like Cape Cod beaches, Dunkin Donuts coffee and Nantucket Nectars. I love Ted Kennedy, Boston’s North End, Sam Adams beers, Click & Clack of “Car-Talk” fame, and Wellfleet oysters. I rooted for Larry Bird and Carlton Fisk. And it’s true that rooted for Big Papi, too. I’m even fond of Howard Dean and spent one of the more fun afternoons of my life hauling in lobster traps on a boat near Portland, Maine. It should also be noted that I hate the New England Patriots and have written about it at great length elsewhere, snarking on Hoodie, the smug, handsome quarterback, their Gordon Gekko wannabe owner, and the red, blue and silver uniforms. (Hello, your name references the birth of the United State of America? How’s about you go back to the old red, blue and white? )

To sum up, the things I love about New England are pretty much every thing but the Patriots who I hate very, very much. And I am not alone. The dislike for this team? It is everywhere. And it goes deep.

And so, surrounded by Pats fans (and anxious to observe them in their own habitat), I quietly rooted against the Patriots, futilely hoping the Bills would find a way to hold them off. It is my decided opinion that Patriots fans have not suffered enough and that Bills fans have suffered tenfold more than their share. Of course, as these things go, the Bills lost, adding just one more layer of suffering for Buffalo fans watching their team blow it.

I think that if you cut a Bills fan in half, you can count the rings of suffering, like counting the rings of very old Oak.

Up by 11 points with about five and a half minutes to play, the Buffalo coaching staff thought it wise to abandon everything they had done heretofore (which had worked beautifully), change tacks to cede the short passing game to Tom Brady who then proceeded to pick them apart into bite sized Buffalo bites and pull his team within five points. But the game was still there for the taking. All the Bills had to do was not turn the ball over, which of course, they promptly did on the ensuing kickoff as the Leodis McKelvin fumble ensured the primacy of the Patriots and the hopelessness of the Bills. As they say, it was just the Bills being the Bills.

For 55 minutes, the Bills outplayed the mighty, imperious Patriots, holding the unstoppable New England offense in check. Only to screw it up. My heart broke a little for Buffalo fans who I’m sure felt like they’ve been here, in this exact spot — on the losing end of an imminently winnable game, watching a choice opportunity slip through their grasps.

It’s sad, really. So sad, in fact, that it occasioned the inaugural Sad Buffalo Face of the TO era.

The Sad Buffalo Face is unique to Buffalo (hence the name) and while other fans have reasons to be sad or mad or dejected, the Sad Buffalo Face is unlike any other franchise face. I have this friend who is a Bills fans and at least 10 times a year, she makes her Sad Buffalo Face. It is the face of dejection. It is at once surprised and resigned, both injured and beyond hurt, full of longing and utter despair. It is a face that says, “How did we end up here again?” while at the same time saying, “I knew we’d end up here again.”

The Sad Buffalo Face always makes me think, there but for the grace of god go I — I could have been born a Bills fan.

Welcome to the full Buffalo experience, Terrell. I think we’re going to be seeing a lot of his Sad Buffalo Face.

Five Teams to Head Bang By

trueslant.com/jodydiperna/2009/07/16/five-teams-that-make-fans-want-to-smash-their-heads-on-their-desks/

From True/Slant on July 16, 2009:

Five Teams that make fans want to smash their heads on their desks

There are teams whose fans throw up their hands in disgust, wallow in despair and watch through paper bags. There are franchises with nothing to celebrate in the rear-view nor any promise of success on the horizon.

Then there are the Pittsburgh Pirates, a franchise in pursuit of a record breaking 17th consecutive losing season. Somehow, the locals remain invested enough to smack their faces off their desks in frustration. Trust me, I know.

It’s particularly bad because Pittsburgh fans can always point to the other local franchises, and few hold up well against the standard set by the Super Bowl champ Steelers and Stanley Cup champ Penguins. Of course, the Pirates don’t help themselves much by (a) losing a lot, (b) trading away nearly every player with any talent, spark or connection to the fans, and (c) losing a lot. (The losing. It bothers folks.)

Still, I suppose there are worse things than being a Pirates fan. Like having your eyelashes tweezed out one by one. Or being questioned by a knuckleheaded pissant like Jeff Sessions. But keeping in the world of sports, as the Pirates complete their annual crawl of shame, here’s my very unscientific short list of fans who have it worse than I do as a Buccos fan:

New York Knicks. Only the Knicks would amass a payroll larger than the GNP of Papua New Guinea and fail so miserably on court. Only the Knicks could allow Isiah Thomas to run the team into the ground from the front office, then add head coach to his job description. To add whipped cream and cherries to it, he was paid to stick around but kinda go away. There is failure, there is incompetence, there is malfeasance. And then there is Isaiah Thomas. It may get better for Knicks fans, but to hoops fans all over New York, particularly those who grew up with Frazier or Ewing, it must feel like James Dolan purchased the team specifically for the purpose of torturing them. Commence head banging.

Buffalo Bills. Remember back in the 1990’s when the Bills lost the first of their four consecutive Super Bowl losses on an errant, last-minute field goal try? Yeah, well those were the good old days for Bills fans. Ownership is financially strapped and there has been talk of moving the team. Since the retirement of Hall of Famer Jim Kelly, the fans have witnessed such luminary quarterbacks as Drew Bledsoe (past his expiration date), Kelly Holcomb, Alex Van Pelt (I am not making that up), J.P. Losman and Trent Edwards. The Bills wear some of the busiest, most hideous uniforms in all of the NFL. And, as though Buffalo fans haven’t suffered enough, enter Terrell Owens (and his shadow, Drew Rosenass.) Good times.

Cleveland. You cannot look at any one single Cleveland franchise without recognizing the sorry state of affairs all over. Context, like timing, is everything. Cleveland fans haven’t enjoyed a championship of any kind since the 1964 Browns. In the 1980’s the Browns lost to the Broncos in back to back AFC Championship games, dubbed “The Drive” and “The Fumble.” but they would be more appropriately titled, “Kill Me, I’m A Browns Fan,” and “Please Kill Me, I’m a Browns Fan.” Did I mention the hijacking, um, relocation of the franchise a decade later? Yeah, that, too.

The Indians came close to a title, but lost in the 1995 World Series to the Braves. And for a super-special encore, they followed that up with the 1997 soul-crushing loss to the Marlins. Do not say the name Jose Mesa in northern Ohio unless you want a fist to the throat.

Those kinds of things take a toll on the collective sports psyche of a town, so much so that ESPN conferred the title of most tortured sports fans on Cleveland a few years back.

But, you say, the Cavaliers have King James! They just got Shaq! This is the year, baby. Except I can’t hear you over the constant, ear-ringing din about Lebron leaving for a bigger market as soon as this contract is up. Every media outlet from Boardman, Oh. to Bristol, Ct. insists he’s already gone, ready to trot off to some bigger market to make more money and become more famous. (I wonder, how much more famous could the guy even be?) Lebron’s assumed departure must hang over Cleveland fans like the sword of Damocles. It’s no way for the city to enjoy what might be the last best chance it has at a title.

Detroit Lions. No list of of futility can skip the team which drives fans to the streets with torches and pitch forks while burning the general manger in effigy. The dome? Football indoors is depressing all by itself. Add the Lions to the equation and I can actually feel my body decaying while I watch them. The Lions draft record was once read at a comedy club. It killed.

Some fans have their hopes dashed every year, but at least they have hope. Despair, thy name is Detroit.

Chicago Cubs. When I was a younger, I thought Cubs fans were reinvigorated each spring. They seemed excited when pitchers and catchers reported for spring training and the tingle of a new start mingled with the spring chill that typically remains on opening day at Wrigley. They kept their hopes for a championship just barely under wraps, but they were there. Oh, they were there. Cubs fans meant it when they said get ‘em next year.

In more recent years, in the post-Bartman era, I get the feeling that a century without a title has gotten the best of them. Cubs faithful are tighter, crankier, and just barely teetering on the edge of sanity. Misery loves company. Maybe it all turned sour after the Boston Red Sox fans and crosstown Chi-White Sox fans got to celebrate in 2004 and 2005. With those historic wins, Cubs fans stood alone as the loneliest long-suffering franchise. It doesn’t seem fun for fans anymore, which is a bummer even for me. Every loss carries the weight of 100 years, every missed opportunity seems inevitable. The Cubs are the face of disappointment. Goats optional.

Honorable mention: L.A. Clippers, Ottawa Senators, N.Y. Jets, Hartford Whalers (I interviewed some locals a couple of years ago for a story on Ron Francis; they’re still bitter).