Speed Kills, the MLB Version: The 2011 All-Fast Guy Team

Bud Selig used to love to say, 'chicks did the long ball,' which was kinda creepy coming from a guy who looks like he has Paris Hilton's dog perched on his head, not to mention wrong-headed, as steroid use finally exploded all over MLB and likely tainted Selig's run as commish permanently -- he will be known as "the Performance Enhancing Drug Commissioner," always linked to Mark McGwire's pathetic obfuscations and Barry Bond's giant coconut head.

At any rate, I'm not a huge fan of the home run. I'll take it, mind you. You'll never hear me gripe when one of my Buccos drills one to left field, but this chick? This chick digs speed. Nothing is more exciting than watching players who turn slow infield rollers into singles, guys who can go from 1st to home on doubles, guys who steal bases and make pitchers uncomfortable, speedy outfielders who get to balls in the gap. Speed, brother. That's what I'm after. And if I were a GM, I'd try to build a ball club with speed at every position.